Randomness for 4/5

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1) The Science of Newton’s Cradle. That’s NEWTON’S CRADLE the hard sf independent movie, not the actual toy.

2) How ten movies would be different if they came from Nicholas Sparks novels. via alg.

3) Opening a hotel room door by going under. Be sure to watch the video.

4) Leonardo DiCaprio as Travis McGee? I have to admit that I’m dubious, but maybe he can pull it off. The real question is why Hollywood continues to make crime/detective movies. Are the budgets low enough to balance low box office? Is it the DVD sales?

5) A Suvudu death match between a GRRM character from A Song of Ice and Fire and a Patrick Rothfuss character inspires this hilarious comment.

6) A Victorian-era sex scholar, and her research.

7) Students recreate “Starry Night” on large scale… in cereal. I wish I was this interesting.

Well, my day is already blown

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I overslept by two hours this morning, and those early morning hours are pretty much solid writing time. That makes me mutter curses and plan to abandon my kid to the Wii later today, but we’ll see.

So instead of posting something original, I’m going to cut and paste an email I sent to a friend. He asked (generally) for links to websites that would help an aspiring novelist FOAF. This is what I sent:

I’m only going to give four suggestions:

First, he should buy a copy of CHILD OF FIRE and study it closely. In fact, he should buy two in case the first copy disintegrates after multiple rereadings. And a third, to give away, I guess.

Second, he should read Slushkiller, along with *all* the comments:

http://nielsenhayden.com/makinglight/archives/004641.html

It starts out as a discussion of rejections, and how professionals judge submitted work, but the conversation ranges over many topics (and even features a typically batty appearance by former WP-er Frank/Franchesca to defend self-publishing).

It’s long, though. Longer than many novels. He should stick with it and read the whole thing.

Third, check out the Learn Writing With Uncle Jim thread on Absolute Write:

http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=6710

The first volume of that thread is 251 pages long, with 25 comments on each page. It’s so long, though, that it was sealed off and a second volume started in the same novel forum. Again, it’s long, but it’s full of useful information.

It’s also been running for seven years. A little of the information is outdated, but it’s corrected in later parts of the conversation.

Fourth and finally, he should be reading agents’ and editors’ blogs. Start here:

http://pubrants.blogspot.com/

And look at the sidebar. First of all, her numerous posts about the way publishing works are fabulous and full of detail. Second, her list of other agent blogs is terrific. The budding novelist should go through those blog rolls and find a few informative blogs to add to his RSS feed. It’ll be trial and error, but it’s important. While he’s working on his craft, he should also be studying the industry.

And that’s a lot of reading, no kidding. That’s a double shitload. But it’ll be fun to read, because writers should be interested in the industry, and doing interesting things is awesome.

And now, and anti-rec: Here’s a list of people the budding writer should not waste their time on:

Anyone who says that NY publishers are closed to new writers.
Anyone who says that editors only want to publish their friends.
Anyone who says that they can’t get published because of their politics.
Anyone who says that you have to write short fiction to break in to novels.
Anyone who says that writers shouldn’t bother with small presses.
Anyone who says that most of what’s published today is crap.
Anyone who says that the big publishers are “dinosaurs”.

Good luck.

Frankly, I think those few links provide a buttload of reading, but if anyone wants to post a link or two of their own, I’ll drop him a note–since I don’t think he reads my blog (melodramatic sigh)–to check out the blog and LiveJournal comments for his FOAF.

Have a productive day.

This is just amazing

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My son found it and I have to share it with you. It’s a bit long (16 minutes) but there isn’t a boring moment. In fact, it’s a beautiful piece of animated storytelling, and the sound design is simply amazing.

Bookstore appearance

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I’ll be appearing at the Tukwila Barnes and Noble. 1:00 on Saturday, April 10th with Mark Henry (Battle of the Network Zombies), Gayle Ann Williams (Tsunami Blue), and Jessa Slade (Seducing the Shadows). There isn’t going to be a reading, but I’ll be signing books and we’ll be giving a talk.

I think. I’m not sure exactly how it will all shape up, but I know I’ll be out talking to readers. If you’re in the area, drop by and say hello.

New word: compastion

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Compastion: n. The uncomfortable feeling you from reading a thank-you-everyone-for-all-the-kind-comments-and-emails-during-this-difficult-time post when you know you could have offered a comforting word but didn’t.

Right here

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Right here in the room with me is a woman in a sparkling satin dress, with a crumpled sash over her right shoulder and a tiara in her well-sprayed hair. Her face is streaked with tears, and she can’t stop saying Thank you! Thank you!. She has to steady herself by clutching the hand of the friend next to her.

That woman is me.

I just sent Man Bites World to my editor at Del Rey. And it’s only seven months and two days past deadline! Why, that’s practically early!

Okay. Not really. In fact, this book was really difficult to write. Add that the revisions for Game of Cages were extensive and time-consuming and you have me missing my target like a blindfolded man in a gun fight.

But it’s turned in and I’m ready for revisions. How do I feel?

So.
Frigging.
Relieved.

To finish the post, here’s a list of the words that MS Word for Mac did not recognize during that final spell check: hitman, baster, motherfuckers, meh, berm, lynchings.

Now I get to work on the next thing.

Fun with words

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How do you guys feel about “spasm” as a verb?

Signal Boost

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Support rape crisis centers and enter to win an Advance Copy of Red Hood’s Revenge, by Jim C. Hines.

Randomness for 4/2

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1) Quentin Tarantino is playing a smurf? Um, okay, I gues.

2) Protecting IP the stand-up comic way. One of my friends was (unfairly) accused of joke-stealing. It was painful to see him (voluntarily) ditch a ten-minute routine about sitting at the big table over Thanksgiving because someone else had a single joke about it. This probably deserves its own post, but I’m not the one to write it.

3) I liked Speed Racer, too. However, I don’t have to call it an “art film” to justify that. It was definitely inventive and non-realistic, and it had a powerful emotional affect on me. I’ve been meaning to rewatch the ending to examine that a little more.

4) Insectophobes, do not click! That sucker is two and a half feet long. If you drown in deep waters and your corpse sinks to the bottom, that thing will be one of the creatures feasting on you.

5) Batman goes to jail for stalking L&O actress. Fate of his two daughters, Harleyquinn and Batgirl, undecided. (More seriously, if you’re a famous person, you get stalkers–freaky, creepy ones–and the only way they hit the news is if they’re colorful in some way or it’s a slow news day.)

6) Beautiful new library in Battery Park.

7) Big house vs short commute time: Which will make us happier? It’s interesting how this just assumes people will be in cars. I wonder what variables public transit adds in? Personally, I like my bus time; it’s pretty much the only dedicated reading time I have left.

April Rules

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FYI: As a general rule, April Fools Day pranks suck. The truth is, too many people are nasty when they think they’re being funny. So this isn’t a “holiday” I like much.

If I can find good examples of AFD jokes, I’ll post them tomorrow. But there really ought to be a set of guidelines for people to follow when thinking up pranks.