Okay you guys, here’s the plan. There are all sorts of people out there convinced that the Rapture will occur on May 21st, because that’s supposed to be Judgement Day. Weirdly, Judgement “Day” supposedly lasts for, like, five months, but never mind that. I have an idea.
Instead of letting yet another “Absolutely true this is the honest deal for reals” pseudo-Apocalypse pass with business as usual–except for the eye-rolling–we should have fun.
That’s why, at about noon PST on 5/21, I plan to be on Twitter. These are the tweets I’ll make:
- My wife says she hears someone playing trumpets, but I can’t hear a thing. All that exercise is rotting her brain.
- HOLY SHIT, SHE JUST VANISHED IN FRONT OF ME!
- WHAT’S GOING ON??? MY WIFE JUST DISAPPEARED LIKE OBI WAN KENOBI! HER EMPTY CLOTHES COLLAPSED ON THE FLOOR!
- WHERE’S MY SON!
- My son has vanished, too! WHERE’S MY SON! WHAT’S GOING ON!! I gotta figure this out!
With the perfect delay between tweets, it’ll seem like the Rapture is really happening.
You should do this, too! If enough people on Twitter and LiveJournal and Facebook post that their loved ones have suddenly vanished (or their Muslim co-worker or Jewish Grandma) it will seem like the Rapture really is happening, and the people wearing those “Judgement Day” T-shirts weren’t chosen to go.
Maybe you can Instagram a set of clothes on the floor of your office, or an empty car up on a lawn.
So! May 21st, noon PST! Remember.