The podcast War Rocket Ajax created the Worst Christmas Mixtape Ever for their War on Christmas episode.
Aside from the warning in the subject header, you should also know these are not just incredibly terrible and physically painful, some are downright offensive.
You’re welcome.
Not Christmas-related. Isn’t that a relief?
1) Skyrim mod replaces dragons with Thomas the Tank Engine. Video. Maybe that should be in a story seeds post.
2) Mountain goats climb nearly vertical dam for the salt.
3) Iron Moon. Video. via Kurt Busiek.
4) The world’s largest mall has an occupancy rate of less than 1%. via Fred Hicks.
5) How long it takes a typical worker to earn as much as their company CEO makes in an hour.
6) Story Corps, Animated. Video. If you have been listening to Story Corps here and there, you’ll know why this is something not to be missed. If not, Story Corps is a project where two people sit with a microphone to permanently record (for the Library of Congress) a personal story from their lives. If the news has you thinking people are mostly awful, Story Corps will change your mind.
1)
Coca Cola comes to France, 1950. By Mark Kauffman pic.twitter.com/GdQetIHQI6
— ClassicPics (@History_Pics) December 23, 2013
2) Ten Things Food Banks Need But Won’t Ask For. At first I thought it was a little late for me to be posting this, but then I smacked my forehead. People are hungry all year round, not just during the holiday.
3) At first, I thought this was satirical, but when I saw that it was Conservapedia, I believed it. Those people are too far gone to satirize: Extreme right wingers rewriting Bible because it’s not conservative enough.
4) Why Marketers Fear The Female Geek. As a marketing category, “geek” is not truly going to come into its own until every kind is welcomed.
5) U of C study demonstrates that “drug-sniffing” dogs do not actually sniff drugs. What they actually do is respond to the K9 officer’s signals on when to alert, essentially giving police the power for warrantless searches.
6) Downtown Seattle’s PERSON OF INTEREST technology. Okay, so it’s not quite POI, but what the SPD has installed (and won’t talk about) is creepily invasive.
3) How English got its current alphabet, and why people say “Ye Olde”. I’m showing this to my son.
4) The origin of common user interface symbols.
5) Kitchy old ceramic statues turned into horror art.
6) Poems made by stacking books.
7) Father makes posters out of strange things he’s said to his kids. I wonder if he’d make one for me: “Do not drink water out of the duck’s butt.”
1) Surreal paintings onto the human face.
2) 80’s New Wave stars as they are now.
3) Six wild modern playgrounds.
4) The bulletproof Bespoke suit.
5) The sound arrows make as they whiz by. Video.
6) Movie posters as neon signs.
7) Video artist Patrick Liddell uploaded a video of himself, ripped it, then uploaded it again over and over to track the degradation of the recording. Video.
1) Parents convince kids their toys come alive at night and take pictures. Actually, there’s no proof these toys are owned by kids or their parents. They might belong to a lonely middle-aged guy who figured out a way to get page views. Still: fun.
2) English has a new preposition, because internet.
4) Shit Roleplayers Say. Video. Why does “I attack the darkness” sound so familiar?
5) An extremely funny and very short video: Carpark. Video. h/t +Jonathan King
6) Marvel, DC, and The Problem, a really great longread by Chris Sims about the history and evolution of superhero comics. Even if you’re not a comics fan, you might be interested in the history of two behemoth competitors in a creative field.
7) Six ways to beat reader’s block. I needed this.
1) 16 People talk about the things they didn’t know about the U.S.A. until they moved here.
2) A girl draws self-portraits before and during an LSD high.
4) Fate Core Kickstarter price breakdowns, in detail.
5) Attn: Screenwriters: Man makes explosive from items purchased in the post-TSA area of an airport. h/t @hradzka
6) Yearbook photos of heavy metal and rock musicians.
7) A long study that measured the harmful effects that video games have on kids.
1) Surgeons make fewer mistakes when they warm up by playing Super Monkey Ball first.
2) Steve Rogers: Premature Anti-Facist. h/t James Nicoll
3) 5 Reasons Packages Get Destroyed (Learned Working at UPS).
4) Unfortunate Publishing Layouts of Our Time.
5) A History of Los Angeles as Told Through 232 Objects.
6) Pacific Rim in the Power Rangers style! Video.
7) Want to deter pests without using chemicals or traps? Try an automatic lawn sprinkler with a motion-sensor attached.
Okay! The jack o’lanterns are lit, making a path from the top of the stairs to my apt door. Spooky lights are lit. Dracula is on the Netflix, but it won’t load because I can’t imagine why a horror classic would be slow to load on Halloween seriously can’t imagine.
I also have a candy bowl with four Butterfingers, four Snickers, four Nestle’s Crunches, and four (meh) Milky Ways.
There is also a cold beer in the fridge, waiting for my kind attention.
I’m going to live blog the number of kids who come, what treats they take, and what costumes they have. Assuming any show up at all.
Fingers crossed.
Anyway, movie’s playing. I always liked swapping out Renfield for Harker at the start of Lugosi’s Dracula. It simplifies things.
6:28: HOORAY! A tiny little girl dressed as “a rabid raccoon” selected a Crunch candy bar. One kid, at least, has come by.
7:00: No other kids have come by.
7:39: No other kids. Should I just give up? Shut out the light and stuff the candy into the freezer?
7:59: Seriously considering the freezer now.
9:49: Shit.
2) Your request to play Devil’s Advocate has been denied.
3) A Captain America motorcycle suit. No turned-down pirate boots, though.
4) Honest Slogans.
6) We’re more creative when we’re tired: ten surprising facts about how brains work.
7) Tips For Improving Street Harassment, in comic form. So. Good.