It’s one a.m.

Standard

In two and a half hours, the shuttle van will be coming to pick up my wife for her week-long trip to Italy. She’ll be gone about a week and a half, and I will be staying home with my son.

There will be much writing time claimed, much pizza eaten (and salad) and some small amount of computer games played. I hope to clear the final level of Swordplay Showdown.

By which I mean that I’ll be checking email, but not doing a lot of internet reading/socializing. At least, I don’t think I will.

Have a great weekend, everyone.

(Oh, and I did a “Take Five” piece for Suvudu. It’s funny. Check it out.

Randomness for 9/7

Standard

1) Author believes publishers ghettoize women readers and writers.

2) The Herald-Sun takes a necessary step. Has there been any doubt that this was coming, and had been coming for a long time?

3) Steam Trek, a parody. Video. Funny and cute. This is what people do when they turn off their TVs.

4) The Book Depository becomes even cooler than you thought possible. Live global tracking of book buying.

5) Common myths about good study habits, and how people (not just kids) learn.

6) Part of the 2008 economic meltdown explained in comic form.

7) This may look like a fake commercial from a horror movie, but it’s a real toy ad from the 1970’s. Prepare to feel your skin crawl. Video.

This is me.

Standard

This post by Ally Carter comes at just the right time, because I’m having a bought of the crazies myself. Mine are probably not like yours–I tend to become quiet, lie in darkened bedrooms, and mutter to myself about all the ways I’ve screwed up.

I’m not fishing for encouragement; I’ve said before that encouragement makes me uncomfortable. Still, I’m going to have to come to some kind of balance, or work out a way to put marketing and sales out of my mind. I’ll find success the way every other writer does: by writing books people want to read.

It’s not going to happen by looking at Twitter traffic, or by skimming the Random House bestsellers to see where my book is rated, or by checking Amazon.com sales rankings, or any of that. I just have to work on my next book.

Storytelling, Heroes, and The Goon.

Standard

I just deleted a long post I’d written about The Goon, which was brought on by reading the trades. It was Volume 8: Those That Is Damned.

It was about happiness, and heroism, and how happiness is for people who are too fucking weak to get out into the world and face down evil and misery. It was also about how fundamental this is to so many heroic story structures. It was also about my own need for order and how fucking weak I am that I pursue happiness when I could be doing more and risking more for justice.

But I couldn’t make my point, possibly because I was talking about a lesson I learned from a beautiful comic book about violent antihero criminals who fight zombies and ghosts, who pal around with werewolves and a giant spider in a bowler hat, and all the humor comes from poo-flinging and punches to the face. In other words, an oddball horror comic that’s full of raw, sophomoric humor and incredibly dark characters and storylines. It didn’t seem to fit, but there you go.

They’re terrific books, though; as the stories go past, they acquire a depth you would never really expect. They’re that well written. If you have a chance to check them out (of the library, maybe?) you should.

BTW, here’s a few sample pages of the comic. The art is representative (iow, beautiful), but it doesn’t capture the verve of the book.

On to other things

Standard

Game of Cages is officially on the bookstore shelves (or in your hot little hands) and I can move on with my life. Maybe.

For instance, my father-in-law took one glance at the Lego guns my son has been building, and he insisted my wife take photos of them. Like this:

IMG_3125

or

IMG_3150

There’s more at the Flickr set.

Needless to say, I suspect we’ll be visiting Brickcon this fall.

Randomness for 9/6

Standard

1) While I have pretty much given up on DOCTOR WHO, the chances are you haven’t. In recognition of that, a link: Warren Ellis challenges artists to create a photograph/original artwork depicting the 13th (and final) reincarnation of The Doctor. It takes a while for the art to really start coming in, so be sure to skim through the pages to check it out. Some is pretty cool.

2) “Vampire” skull discovered.

3) 600 Hanna Barbera Characters This pretty much has to be viewed at the original size. And I reject the notion that “Snorkle” was the main character on The Banana Splits. I reject it!

4) Brazillian Legolas of the cell phones.

5) A quick summation of the problems inherent in our student loan system.

6) Seanan McGuire, this year’s Campbell Award winner, lays out the dos and don’ts for folks who want to support an author with a new book out. Like her, I would rather people not send me notes about Amazon.com reviews. Unlike her, it’s because I’ve already read them. The other stuff she says is pretty much spot on, too.

7) Oh. My. God. Why didn’t anyone tell me David Fincher was making an animated movie of THE GOON??!! There’s even a trailer already! Video. It looks incredible! WANT!!!

“Did you think all this up yourself? Out of your head?“

Standard

Today was the book signing. What do you mean you don’t believe me?! Proof? Here’s the proof!

IMG_7449

That’s me, in case you didn’t realize. The white shirt I’m wearing was freshly ironed twenty seconds before that photo was taken, but as soon as I hung it on myself it shriveled like a flower petal dropped into acid. Those are my books, my pens, my individually-wrapped prunes dried plums, and my oh-so-stylish sneakers.

If you’re wondering how it went, I sold eight books, four of book 1, four of book 2. That’s about five books more than expected. For those that care, here’s how it broke down:

Two books to a neighbor, the mother of Mango Eater’s best friend (she was the only buyer I already knew).
Two books to a woman buying gifts for her house-bound 94-year-old friend.
One book to a man buying a gift for his 20-year-old daughter.
One book to an aspiring writer.
One book to a bookstore employee for her son.
One book to an older woman who was scary skinny. She’s the one who provided the subject header above. (My response: “That’s the job!” She then asked rather stridently “Who’s this Ray Lilly? Is he good or evil?” What I wish I’d said was “I reject your dialectic!” What I actually said was “Uh….”)

I also mailed off all the giveaway books except the cookbooks that Carol Wong won. She hasn’t responded to two requests for a mailing address, and it would be a shame if her books went to the library or something because she used a spam trap address in the blog.

Now I’m back home and I’m not stress-eating or stress-drinking or stress-napping. I’m just hanging out with the family, and as soon as Mango Eater finishes building his Lego, he’s going to read us the next chapter of Harry Potter.

Book signing rules

Standard

Having read the long list of restrictions at Tony Blair’s book signing, I’ve decided to institute my own list of restrictions for tomorrow’s signing. Please adhere closely to these rules.

1. No photography. All photographs with cameras or camera phones is strictly prohibited due to the danger of capturing one of The Author’s many bad sides. A sketch artist will be provided and pencil sketches will be available for a reasonable price.

2. Backpacks, purses and satchels are allowed, but all fannypacks will be confiscated and disposed of in the alley out back. Because dude, fannypacks.

3. The Author is happy to add a personal dedication to books as well as sign them, but no dedications will be made out to given names. Nicknames only. Also, The Author will be assigning all nicknames on the spot. Got that, Skippy?

4. To keep things moving quickly, all conversation should be limited to complimentary assessments of The Author’s appearance and demeanor, as well as unqualified praise for his books.

5. No cell phones conversations, Twittering, texting or “sexting” permitted, unless The Author is allowed to read/listen in, and finds the conversation amusing.

6. Physical assault is strongly discouraged. The Author should not be spit upon, slapped, struck with a weasel (dead), shot, punched, stabbed, struck with a ferret (living or dead), kicked, or head-butted. In fact, let’s just go with “No touching,” okay?

7. Child care will be provided for book purchases who require it. A special playpen will be installed before the event; readers will not have to worry about children escaping the pen, as it is a very modern kind that comes with a top.

8. Readers are not required to bring their own pen, but those who don’t will be charged an additional $1 ink fee to help compensate for the loss of The Author’s specially-formulated brand of ink (from Bic).

9. All pens provided by the readers themselves must be disinfected by The Author’s staff before the signing. Charge for that: also $1.

That’s all, I think. Adding a tenth restriction seems… excessive. Better to be easy-going and understated.

See you tomorrow, and be sure to OBEY.

Book signing tomorrow

Standard

Hey, guys. I will be having a book signing tomorrow afternoon at Magnolia’s Bookstore in Seattle. It’s easily accessible by the 24 or 31 bus lines, and there’s plenty of parking. I’ll start things off around 1pm and end about half-past “I don’t think anyone else is coming.”

Both books should be available and it’s a nice little store with a substantial kids/YA section. Please drop by and say hello.

I blog prolificly!

Standard

Have you ever wondered what I sound like? Expecting a deep, rich voice? A high, shrieking voice?

Well, you can listen to the Seattle Geekly podcast right here and listen to an interview with me. Secrets are revealed! I talk about book 3! Even better (from my POV) they say why they think my books are good.

I only wish I knew how they digitally altered my voice, because there’s no way I really, truly sound like that. I mean, I can hear myself inside my own head, right? Right?